Jesus, at this point in the morning you would have been up all night long, subject to mocking, cruel beatings, whippings and scourging. You would have longed for sleep, longed for comfort, longed for relief from the torture. And yet you knew, you knew, that the worst was yet to come…. more beatings and a long trudge to Golgotha with a rough, heavy cross pressing painfully into your already torn and tender back.
I can’t imagine, Jesus, the pain, the agony, and the shame that you went through. What was going through your mind as you endured it all? A constant murmur of prayer from your dry lips? “Help me… help me, Father” I imagine you saying over and over again. But maybe that’s what I would be saying. Maybe the Son of God had something else going through his mind.
Jesus, you knew me on this day. You already held me in your heart. And your loving thought toward me on this dark day was, “I can’t imagine life for eternity without my girl Kristen. So I will endure. I will persist through this…”
Jesus, that you would endure such torture and pain for me… what can I say? What can I do?
I know the answer is to give you my life in return. To sacrifice everything for you, so that you might have the gift you deserve in return. A life for a life. Your life for mine. It is so clear in this moment. And yet, do I live this way? Do I truly live for you? What have I sacrificed for you? Have I given my all to my Saviour who endured so much for me and who gave me the opportunity through his sacrifice to experience an abundant and vibrant relationship with God?
Jesus… thank you for what you endured this dark day in history. Help me to understand the depth of your sacrifice that I might be willing to give my life to You, to be used by You for your purposes and for your glory.