Journeys of Healing


She sits before me, with hand cupped around tea mug, sharing words and feelings with me.

Words that I can’t quite understand because I come from such a different place right now.

But I hear her heart.

I hear the loneliness in her heart. I hear the cry of desire for community. I hear the pain of memories from childhood. I hear emotions of feeling trapped where she is.

The compassion in my own heart runs deep for her. We have so much history, she and I. History of high school years, of early adulthood and independence, of sharing living space, of marriage and moves and babies. I know her.

Or… I used to know her… but now it seems that I have no frame of reference for what she is experiencing, or feeling, or struggling with. I try desperately to find common ground as she speaks. I am desperate to reach out to her, to help her know the love that enfolds her daily.

Yet I fear that she does not want to hear the words I wish to say. She may not take comfort in them, but may feel offended.

So I sit quiet, with words in my mouth…

For this is what I know:

“But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed. ”                  Is. 53:5

How do I know?

I have seen the power of the Spirit at work, in giving insight and knowledge where none existed before.

“…in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ, in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge.”                Col.2:3

There can be such insight and wisdom from Jesus. Even when counselling and therapy have not resulted in change. Even when someone can work on themselves and their mind and their thoughts and try to change things on their own… and then find that they still suffer from fear, from patterns, from beliefs that are not true.

“I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name”             Is.45:2-3

Sometimes in prayer, listening prayer, (where you do the listening, not the speaking), the Spirit gives a picture, a word, or an insight that is presented to the person being prayed for. Often the picture or word doesn’t make a lot of sense to the one receiving it, but when offered to the person, there will be a response in their own spirit. They know immediately what the word or picture refers to. Jesus takes them back to a place where there are roots of pain, often hidden for years. This is the beginning of healing. For only Jesus can take them to the root of memory; it is a mystery how.

This is the beginning of freedom, which I believe the passage in Isaiah refers to. Jesus breaking down the things that keep us in captivity, that keep us bound in spirit, in mind or in body.

Often where there has been great pain, there is a lie that results. A lie that takes root in the spirit and can have far-reaching effects all throughout life. Lies like:

God does not love me.

God is not good.

God does not protect.

These are lies from the one who does not want you to know the Truth about God. And they entrap and ensnare a person. Unfairly. A moment of pain, and the enemy uses that very opportunity to swoop in and whisper a lie in your ear. In the moment of pain, the lie makes more sense than the truth. And you agree with it. And this is the default belief at the root of your fear. Even though you may openly verbalize something else: “God loves me!”, deep down in your spirit there lies this ugly untruth. And that untruth is what can direct your inner thoughts. Until there is healing of this root of untruth, you can try everything in the world, but the truth is, there is only one who can truly set you completely free.

“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the spirit of the Lord is, there is FREEDOM.”      2Cor.3:17


7 responses »

  1. Your comment regarding “the beginning of freedom” made me wonder what might exist on the far side of freedom (or at least deep into the territory)… I winder what kind of people might live there… or if people could live there… perhaps it would only be a place to visit briefly (as opposed to dwell). So much of our identity is stored up in place and relationship and process and routine… freedom would certainly threaten, if not destroy so much of that… perhaps that is why so many institutions, groups and individuals choose not to be free… it’s a much safer and comfortable choice for everyone concerned. Do keep writing and caring the way you do… you are good at it!

    • I think that beyond the beginning of freedom, there is more and more freedom, as we move deeper and deeper into the heart and will of Christ. It’s true that much of our identity is, as you said, “stored up in place and relationship and process and routine”. But what if we were to change our paradigm and begin to more fully identify with Christ? Would that free us from seeking identity in all those other places? I think you are right: people choose not to be free because routines and habits are very comfortable and change is hard, and one fears the “unknown” of freedom. Thanks for your thoughts, Gord.

  2. Pingback: Why you are never alone, even when you feel that you are « Heart Murmurs

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